Baby Pooped on me...

So that others may learn.

Moderators: carlson1, Charles L. Cotton, Keith B

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby Oldgringo » Mon Oct 08, 2012 3:28 pm

Gross OUT! :roll: My, how we have advanced. My parents had our baby shoes bronzed back in the day.

Now, y'all are saving the by-products of life? How quaint.
User avatar
Oldgringo
Senior Member
 
Posts: 8857
Joined: Sat Mar 08, 2008 10:15 pm
Location: Piney Woods of Texas and NW Montana

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby Texas Dan Mosby » Mon Oct 08, 2012 5:14 pm

knotquiteawake wrote:
Texas Dan Mosby wrote:Babies, like firearms, must be handled with safety in mind. However, unlike firearms, they can never be truly "unloaded", and, when you least expect it, are capable of violently discharging their contents from BOTH ends .
Be careful out there.
:mrgreen:


So what you're saying is a baby is always loaded and don't point it at anything you want to keep clean?


Absolutely.

ALWAYS keep the baby pointed in a safe direction, and treat the baby as if it is loaded at all times....because it IS!

Be careful not to jostle, tickle, or rapidly move the baby, as they have no safety, and this can lead to unintended discharges.

Make sure you use the right load for your baby, as some loads can develop unsafe pressures resulting in extremely powerful discharges, or can lead to the dreaded multi-discharge, as opposed to the single shot discharge. Chilli is not an appropriate load for your baby.

Never point a baby at anyone, unless you are willing to use it. Laundry fee's are no joke, so it's best to avoid the situation from the get go. Should you find yourself needing to contact a dry cleaner, it is best to find one with experience dealing with this issue as opposed to the first dry cleaner you see.

Good luck!
88 day wait for the state to approve my constitutional right to bear arms...
User avatar
Texas Dan Mosby
Senior Member
 
Posts: 729
Joined: Sun Jun 20, 2010 3:54 pm

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby The Annoyed Man » Mon Oct 08, 2012 5:23 pm

Texas Dan Mosby wrote:
knotquiteawake wrote:
Texas Dan Mosby wrote:Babies, like firearms, must be handled with safety in mind. However, unlike firearms, they can never be truly "unloaded", and, when you least expect it, are capable of violently discharging their contents from BOTH ends .
Be careful out there.
:mrgreen:


So what you're saying is a baby is always loaded and don't point it at anything you want to keep clean?


Absolutely.

ALWAYS keep the baby pointed in a safe direction, and treat the baby as if it is loaded at all times....because it IS!

Be careful not to jostle, tickle, or rapidly move the baby, as they have no safety, and this can lead to unintended discharges.

Make sure you use the right load for your baby, as some loads can develop unsafe pressures resulting in extremely powerful discharges, or can lead to the dreaded multi-discharge, as opposed to the single shot discharge. Chilli is not an appropriate load for your baby.

Never point a baby at anyone, unless you are willing to use it. Laundry fee's are no joke, so it's best to avoid the situation from the get go. Should you find yourself needing to contact a dry cleaner, it is best to find one with experience dealing with this issue as opposed to the first dry cleaner you see.

Good luck!

And ALWAYS keep your booger hoog off the bang switch (belly button)!
"Give me Liberty, or I'll get up and get it myself." — Me
"Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under." — H. L. Mencken
"A ragamuffin knows he’s only a beggar at the door of God’s mercy." — The Ragamuffin Gospel, by Brennan Manning
User avatar
The Annoyed Man
Senior Member
 
Posts: 16630
Joined: Wed Jan 16, 2008 12:59 pm
Location: Grapevine, Texas

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby SewTexas » Mon Oct 08, 2012 6:44 pm

Texas Dan Mosby wrote:
knotquiteawake wrote:
Texas Dan Mosby wrote:Babies, like firearms, must be handled with safety in mind. However, unlike firearms, they can never be truly "unloaded", and, when you least expect it, are capable of violently discharging their contents from BOTH ends .
Be careful out there.
:mrgreen:


So what you're saying is a baby is always loaded and don't point it at anything you want to keep clean?


Absolutely.

ALWAYS keep the baby pointed in a safe direction, and treat the baby as if it is loaded at all times....because it IS!

Be careful not to jostle, tickle, or rapidly move the baby, as they have no safety, and this can lead to unintended discharges.

Make sure you use the right load for your baby, as some loads can develop unsafe pressures resulting in extremely powerful discharges, or can lead to the dreaded multi-discharge, as opposed to the single shot discharge. Chilli is not an appropriate load for your baby.

Never point a baby at anyone, unless you are willing to use it. Laundry fee's are no joke, so it's best to avoid the situation from the get go. Should you find yourself needing to contact a dry cleaner, it is best to find one with experience dealing with this issue as opposed to the first dry cleaner you see.

Good luck!




Oh my!!!! "rlol" that's great, problem is I've got a cough that won't quit and I just about lost my breath as I read that...but, thanks for the laugh, we needed it.
~Tracy
Barracktose Intolerant
SewTexas
Senior Member
 
Posts: 1755
Joined: Wed Dec 22, 2010 11:52 pm
Location: San Antonio area

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby TexasGal » Tue Oct 09, 2012 3:52 pm

"rlol" "rlol" Oh heavens, I need air! Thanks so much for taking me back to the best years of my life.

My son had a knack of filling his diaper with the most incredible nuclear waste and then when you attempted to pick him up, he would raise his legs up high and spill the contents out from both sides. One Saturday morning the pastor and his wife were visiting us in our home for the first time. I was so nervous trying to make a good impression. My son was toddling across the floor right in front of them and stopped as if on cue. With horror, we all heard an alarming sound accompanied with an eye watering aroma. I quickly snatched him up. He performed the famous unloading maneuver. It was a long 10 feet to the bedroom as fast as I could take him. After a quick bath in the tub, I re-dressed him and came back out to find them gone. I was told there was a moment of complete silence after I whisked him away and then the pastor abruptly stood up and said, "Well!....Time to go!" and left. My son is 26 years old now and I do miss those days.
The Only Bodyguard I Can Afford is Me
Texas CHL Instructor
NRA Basic Pistol Instructor
NRA Life Member, TSRA Member, TFC Member
User avatar
TexasGal
Senior Member
 
Posts: 1605
Joined: Tue Aug 04, 2009 1:37 am
Location: Fort Worth, TX

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby Oldgringo » Tue Oct 09, 2012 5:34 pm

This thread takes me back:

One upon a time in a land faraway, we had a neutered white, longhaired cat who would wait for company to arrive, usually LCA church company. Once everyone was seated, MEW would then parade through the room to , "...oohs and ahs, about how pretty he is, etc.". When MEW had heard enough, he would sit in the middle of the group, lift his leg and proceed to clean himself.

MEW, although a house cat, was later diagnosed to have feline leukemia and had to go to the 'Rainbow Bridge' for cats. I still think of MEW and miss him. Like I said that was long ago in a land faraway.
User avatar
Oldgringo
Senior Member
 
Posts: 8857
Joined: Sat Mar 08, 2008 10:15 pm
Location: Piney Woods of Texas and NW Montana

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby mossytxn » Wed Oct 10, 2012 1:38 pm

It gets better. Last night my just barely two year old dropped a tennis ball sized load in the tub. i had just turned around to grab a washcloth and he looks up and says "Daddy poopoo" and points. Yes son, yes it is. Now we need another bath. And some clorox wipes.
Gun control is hitting the bullseye
mossytxn
Member
 
Posts: 56
Joined: Thu Oct 02, 2008 9:16 am
Location: Plano

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby SewTexas » Wed Oct 10, 2012 2:00 pm

mossytxn wrote:It gets better. Last night my just barely two year old dropped a tennis ball sized load in the tub. i had just turned around to grab a washcloth and he looks up and says "Daddy poopoo" and points. Yes son, yes it is. Now we need another bath. And some clorox wipes.


and now he knows what it is and how to say it....it's time to work on where to ummm, put it, so to speak. (I'm so glad mine are teenagers)
~Tracy
Barracktose Intolerant
SewTexas
Senior Member
 
Posts: 1755
Joined: Wed Dec 22, 2010 11:52 pm
Location: San Antonio area

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby OldCurlyWolf » Thu Oct 11, 2012 5:03 pm

SewTexas wrote:
mossytxn wrote:It gets better. Last night my just barely two year old dropped a tennis ball sized load in the tub. i had just turned around to grab a washcloth and he looks up and says "Daddy poopoo" and points. Yes son, yes it is. Now we need another bath. And some clorox wipes.


and now he knows what it is and how to say it....it's time to work on where to ummm, put it, so to speak. (I'm so glad mine are teenagers)


My youngest is 32 and her youngest is 6 months.

"rlol"
I won't be wronged, I won't be insulted, and I won't be laid a hand on.
I don't do those things to other people and I require the same of them.

Politicians should serve two terms, one in office and one in prison
User avatar
OldCurlyWolf
Senior Member
 
Posts: 811
Joined: Sat Sep 18, 2010 3:00 am

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby stevie_d_64 » Tue Feb 26, 2013 7:55 am

NordicTexan wrote:There is always something funny about a "diaper containment" failure to those of us who have experienced it ourselves and they always make for good stories.


I heard NASA created a solution for leakage, and have failed to effectively spin off that echnology to the public...

Sure Velcro and Tang were easy...Diaper containment technology is one of America's best kept secrets...

Although, the Chinese may have hack it and stole it right from under our noses, pardon the pun...
"Perseverance and Preparedness triumph over Procrastination and Paranoia every time.” -- Steve
NRA - Life Member
"Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?"
Μολών λαβέ!
User avatar
stevie_d_64
Senior Member
 
Posts: 7550
Joined: Fri Mar 04, 2005 11:17 pm
Location: Houston, Texas 77089

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby anygunanywhere » Tue Feb 26, 2013 7:58 am

Our oldest had one while we were crossing the Atchafalaya basin bridge in Louisiana.

Bridge went on forever that day.

Had all the windows down.

Anygunanywhere
The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants. - Thomas Jefferson
III%
http://oathkeepers.org/oath/
User avatar
anygunanywhere
Senior Member
 
Posts: 4954
Joined: Fri Apr 01, 2005 9:16 am
Location: La Grange, Texas

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby bauer » Wed Feb 27, 2013 1:00 pm

SewTexas wrote: (I'm so glad mine are teenagers)


They must be boys? Ill take baby poop over a 14 yo raging, hormone induced, teenage fits. It gets adventurous at times.
R.I.P SSG Ward 6 Apr 2013
"Garry Owen"
User avatar
bauer
Member
 
Posts: 148
Joined: Mon Apr 23, 2012 9:16 pm
Location: Round Rock

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby Gungirl » Wed Feb 27, 2013 11:58 pm

:iagree:
The teenager thing is getting old....on my third one! I would much rather be pooped on!!
CHL packet sent 11-21-12, CHL license received 1-19-13
XDs 45. Mossberg 500
Gungirl
Member
 
Posts: 63
Joined: Thu Nov 15, 2012 9:59 pm
Location: Rockwall Tx

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby RottenApple » Thu Feb 28, 2013 12:42 am

Gungirl wrote::iagree:
The teenager thing is getting old....on my third one! I would much rather be pooped on!!


:iagree:

It's doubtful my 13 and 15 year olds will see 14 and 16. And it's less than a month away for both of them! :banghead:
User avatar
RottenApple
Senior Member
 
Posts: 1581
Joined: Sun Jan 09, 2011 3:19 pm
Location: Wylie, TX

Re: Baby Pooped on me...

Postby lightbulb1988 » Tue Apr 09, 2013 10:11 am

Great story, started my day with a good laugh. :lol:
lightbulb1988
Member
 
Posts: 61
Joined: Sun Mar 25, 2012 11:44 am

PreviousNext

Return to Never Again!!

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: healthinsp and 3 guests