New Scientific Discovery

[Pawpaw]

The heaviest element known to science

The CSIRO (Commonwealth Scientific and Industrial Research Organization) has discovered the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element is Governmentium ( Gv ).

It has one neutron, 25 assistant neutrons, 88 deputy neutrons and 198 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lefton-like particles called peons.

Since Governmentium has no electrons or protons, it is inert. However, it can be detected, because it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact. A tiny amount of Governmentium can cause a reaction normally taking less than a second to take from four days to four years to complete.

Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2- 6 years. It does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become neutrons, forming isodopes.

This characteristic of moron promotion leads some scientists to believe that Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a critical concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as critical morass.

When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium , an element that radiates just as much energy as Governmentium since it has half as many peons but twice as many morons. All of the money is consumed in the exchange, and no other by products are produced.

(I wish I could claim to have written this. Alas, I shamelessly stole it from another forum. )

[SRH78]

Haha

[RottenApple]

(.....I shamelessly stole it from another forum. )

As have I!

[comp73]

First time I've seen this and I can't stop laughing

[BigGuy]

First time I saw this, I laughed, and laughed, and laughed .... until I suddenly realized is wasn't funny.

[ffemt300]

Isodopes! Ha!

[misterholt]

This is amazing!

[surprise_i'm_armed]

It's too bad that Governmentium has been much easier to create than Unobtanium (with a tip of the hat to Avatar).

SIA

[WildBill]

The heaviest element known to science ...

As a trained scientist, I am trying to find some kind of flaw in this new discovery... , but I can't.

[teri]

First time I saw this, I laughed, and laughed, and laughed .... until I suddenly realized is wasn't funny.

What is really sad is that Governmentium is spinning out of control. One day it will implode leaving lots of hot air in its wake...

[terryg]

Ha Ha. I had seen this before, but it was a nice refresher. Borrowed and posted on Facebook.