Check on your friends during the holiday season.

[clarionite]

Thursday one of my best friends took his life.

He was a great guy, but had his demons. He lost his mom to cancer this year. He had some legal and financial problems. And has struggled with some depression and drinking issues his whole life. I knew he was depressed, but thought I was getting through to him. I've spent a lot of time with him over the past three months, both in person and on the phone. He was at my house twice last week. And I talked to him on the phone Wednesday on my drive home from work.

Looking back all the signs were there. But looked like he was dealing with the health and financial issues.

Check on your friends that may be struggling during the holidays.

[chasfm11]

I'm so sorry to hear this. We had a couple from our old church lose their teen-aged daughter in the same way at almost this same date. The warning signs where there for her, too, and her parents thought that she had turned a corner. But she hadn't.

Having deal with several people with mental problems, I have learned that they are often in a mental pain that cannot be described. They are looking for a way to end that pain. Unfortunately, there are no easy ways to make that kind of pain go away. Our society does not handle people with mental issues very well which can make their personal pain worse.

Of all of the things that have been stolen from our population, hope is greatest. People used to find hope through their faith but some much has been done to destroy faith based thinking that it doesn't help the way that it once did. Through the depression and the world wars, hope was higher than it is today. So it isn't surprising to me that suicide is more the "medicine of choice" for the lack of hope. It is so sad.

[carlson1]

Sorry for the situations mentioned above. As a Pastor and Counselor I deal with people with depression more this time of the year than any other time. Also more people pass away. I have already had two funerals. I have a memorial service this Friday and on December 15. As mentioned by clarionite please check on people and in person if possible. Share your “family” time with friends. It does make a difference. So many times they just need someone to listen more than need advice.

[clarionite]

Sorry for the situations mentioned above. As a Pastor and Counselor I deal with people with depression more this time of the year than any other time. Also more people pass away. I have already had two funerals. I have a memorial service this Friday and on December 15. As mentioned by clarionite please check on people and in person if possible. Share your “family” time with friends. It does make a difference. So many times they just need someone to listen more than need advice.

Piecing together the timeline from his siblings, other friends and paperwork I'm going through (He named me executor and POA) it looks like he had this planned for months, and quite possibly a year. I think he planned on doing it on Thanksgiving. I delayed that by having him over with my family. I also had him over that Saturday, with the premise of helping me add a new roof to my goat enclosure. It was rainy and cold so we sat around and talked while we watched 4 episodes of Alone. I really thought I was getting through to him. And I didn't know he was a bad off as he was. I really wish I could have done more, but he was a very private person. To the point of paranoia. Pushing any harder would have had the opposite effect.

[carlson1]

Sorry for the situations mentioned above. As a Pastor and Counselor I deal with people with depression more this time of the year than any other time. Also more people pass away. I have already had two funerals. I have a memorial service this Friday and on December 15. As mentioned by clarionite please check on people and in person if possible. Share your “family” time with friends. It does make a difference. So many times they just need someone to listen more than need advice.

Piecing together the timeline from his siblings, other friends and paperwork I'm going through (He named me executor and POA) it looks like he had this planned for months, and quite possibly a year. I think he planned on doing it on Thanksgiving. I delayed that by having him over with my family. I also had him over that Saturday, with the premise of helping me add a new roof to my goat enclosure. It was rainy and cold so we sat around and talked while we watched 4 episodes of Alone. I really thought I was getting through to him. And I didn't know he was a bad off as he was. I really wish I could have done more, but he was a very private person. To the point of paranoia. Pushing any harder would have had the opposite effect.

No doubt you were his best friend. You tried and it isn’t like you did nothing. Sometimes it’s super hard to tell if folks are actually hearing (rather than listening) to your counsel. I have been doing this for over 33 years along with my time as a LEO. I have no more knowledge now than I did 33 years ago just more experience. Like you said earlier we need to check on each other. Friends a golden!

[philip964]

Suicide is very hard on those left behind. Everyone feels they could have done something. Most likely there was nothing anyone could do.

The brain is an organ just like the liver, heart or kidneys. Sometimes it malfunctions like any other organ.

We all know someone who has done this, the pain you feel is real.

There is really very little you can do. To me it was always a surprise. Yes looking back there were signs but nothing really substantial until it happened.

Very sorry for your loss.

[Boxerrider]

I am sorry for your loss, and am praying for the friends and family affected.
Suicide deaths are devastating, and incredibly tough to prevent.