CA.vs. TX. A Story...

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CA.vs. TX. A Story...

Postby handog » Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:25 am

The governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the governor’s dog, then bites the governor. The governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie Bambi and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.

“He calls animal control. Animal control captures the coyote and bills the state $200 for testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it. He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the state $200 for testing it for diseases. The governor goes to the hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and getting his bite wound bandaged.

“The running trail gets shut down for six months while the California Fish and Game Department conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals. The governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a ‘coyote awareness program’ for residents of the area. The Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.

“The governor’s security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training, re: the nature of coyotes. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) protests the coyote’s relocation and files a $5 million suit against the state.

The governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and tries to attack him and his dog. The governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging. “The governor spent 50 cents on a .380-caliber, hollow-point cartridge. Buzzards ate the dead coyote. :smilelol5:

“And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.”
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Re: CA.vs. TX. A Story...

Postby Skiprr » Sun Jan 06, 2013 10:46 am

But it wasn't a state-issued pistol. It was his individually purchased pistol carried as a private citizen with his Concealed Handgun License. So neither the handgun nor the ammunition cost the state a penny. :mrgreen:
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Re: CA.vs. TX. A Story...

Postby texanjoker » Sun Jan 06, 2013 12:26 pm

Moral of the story is the Texas governor is green...He fed the buzzards lol
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Re: CA.vs. TX. A Story...

Postby tbrown » Sun Jan 06, 2013 1:59 pm

"Buzzards got to eat. Same as worms." - Josey Wales
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Re: CA.vs. TX. A Story...

Postby cheezit » Sun Jan 06, 2013 2:30 pm

texas isnt broke? really? :headscratch
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Re: CA.vs. TX. A Story...

Postby Dave2 » Sun Jan 06, 2013 2:57 pm

cheezit wrote:texas isnt broke? really? :headscratch

Not nearly as broke as CA (or IL).
I am not a lawyer, nor have I played one on TV, nor did I stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night, nor should anything I say be taken as legal advice. If it is important that any information be accurate, do not use me as the only source.
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Re: CA.vs. TX. A Story...

Postby Longhorn-breeder » Sun Jan 06, 2013 3:42 pm

handog wrote:The governor of California is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and attacks the governor’s dog, then bites the governor. The governor starts to intervene, but reflects upon the movie Bambi and then realizes he should stop because the coyote is only doing what is natural.

“He calls animal control. Animal control captures the coyote and bills the state $200 for testing it for diseases and $500 for relocating it. He calls a veterinarian. The vet collects the dead dog and bills the state $200 for testing it for diseases. The governor goes to the hospital and spends $3,500 getting checked for diseases from the coyote and getting his bite wound bandaged.

“The running trail gets shut down for six months while the California Fish and Game Department conducts a $100,000 survey to make sure the area is now free of dangerous animals. The governor spends $50,000 in state funds implementing a ‘coyote awareness program’ for residents of the area. The Legislature spends $2 million to study how to better treat rabies and how to permanently eradicate the disease throughout the world.

“The governor’s security agent is fired for not stopping the attack. The state spends $150,000 to hire and train a new agent with additional special training, re: the nature of coyotes. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (PETA) protests the coyote’s relocation and files a $5 million suit against the state.

The governor of Texas is jogging with his dog along a nature trail. A coyote jumps out and tries to attack him and his dog. The governor shoots the coyote with his state-issued pistol and keeps jogging. “The governor spent 50 cents on a .380-caliber, hollow-point cartridge. Buzzards ate the dead coyote. :smilelol5:

“And that, my friends, is why California is broke and Texas is not.”
:smash:




I needed that laugh, and having grown up in Cali I sure can see it as a possibility! :thumbs2:
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Re: CA.vs. TX. A Story...

Postby TexasCajun » Sun Jan 06, 2013 7:29 pm

cheezit wrote:texas isnt broke? really? :headscratch

If walking into the 2013 legislative session with a $8 billion surplus is broke, then yeah, we're broke.
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