Share your Personal encounters with

[CHLLady]

Aggressive or non-aggressive approaches from individuals or groups please!

Jumping Frog made a great statement that he doesn't care if he's mean or rude to approaching people. That really stirred something up in me, especially after my shooting instructor told me yesterday that I have "mama bear syndrome", that I don't think to react the same way for myself as I would for my children... I want to change that way of thinking. I need to work on not trying to rationalize their behavior, but put the brakes on immediately and take control like Jumping Frog.

I have not yet had any aggressive encounters, but have been approached several times by women and men asking for money. Which did disturb me afterwards because they got into my comfort zone, I realize that now. (Before CC)

I want to know how the Ladies in this forum have fared. What did you do? Corrections you will make in future encounters? Ladies, please share so that others like myself can learn from your experiences.

[ChoqPOC]

I personally don't allow anyone in my personal space, but that is how I have always been even before concealed carry. I am originally from Los Angeles and there you learn very young to keep people at a distance. I have dealt with people (strangers and friends) who don't mind and actually love being close and personal - but they know, I am not the one to participate. For strangers, I suspect its the look on my face. Or, if they get to close, my immediate action to ensure I have a safe distance.

[CHLLady]

Before carrying my personal space was much closer, but now reading about other experiences, it's much further.

[SewTexas]

I have been "marked" in a couple of WM parking lots. Once I was easily able to get to my car before the guy really knew that I knew he was tracking me.
One other time though, I only had a couple of bags, thankfully, I spotted a guy tracking me, keeping an eye on me, I moved all of my bags to my left hand, slung my purse messenger style and put my hand under my shirt on my gun....he did a U turn and quick stepped away best feeling eva!!!!

[MotherBear]

The biggest issue I've had is with those folks who stand at the intersections trying to get donations for some drug rehab place. I can't remember what it's called, but I see them a lot and they're very aggressive. I've had one guy come up to me in the middle lane and knock on my window and signal for me to roll it down -- nice try, no way. I know they're supposedly with a legitimate charity, but they make me extremely uncomfortable when they're that pushy. I don't see that there's anything I can do about it aside from making sure the car doors are locked, but I sure don't like it.

The only other thing I can think of is when I was coming out of the library once (when I lived in Austin) and there was a guy walking around the parking lot who had to have been drunk or on something. He approached us and was very friendly and wanted to talk to the kids. This was pre-CHL for me. He didn't do or say anything threatening, but he just wasn't right. I got the kids in the car as quickly as I could and called the police as we drove away (I rarely talk on the phone while driving, but I didn't feel comfortable staying). I've wondered if anything ever came of it.

[VMI77]

My first encounter was as a teen on a 2400 acre deer lease in the Hill Country in the middle of nowhere. I came back to camp to find my father cooking a meal for two future Democratic voters. Suspecting my father was just being a nice guy, but being cautious because I didn't know the whole situation, I stayed far enough away so that if attacked I'd be able to get off at least two shots with my bolt-action rifle. They ate and went on their way but after that I always carried a handgun as well as a rifle when we went deer hunting.

Since then I've been directly approached numerous times. The most threatening encounter was years ago, a bum in Tulsa, when there was no CC and I was unarmed. I concentrated on watching his hands and eventually convinced him he wasn't getting anything from me, causing him to go away.

My wife used to call me the Beggar King because I was approached so often. Since the guy in Tulsa I haven't had any contacts that I perceived to be threatening. I warn off or let approach based on my threat analysis. The other day I had a woman approach me at a gas pump asking if I would fill her gas can so she could get to her job in town. While I didn't buy the story, she wasn't asking for money, so I told her to bring me the can and filled it for her. Previously, in Austin, I had a woman on crutches, with one leg, approach me as I got out of my vehicle at a fast food place, asking for money for something to eat. I gave her some money and she went directly into the adjacent Wendy's.

The woman at the gas station sort of surprised me because these days I'm told I don't look like a very friendly guy.

[CHLLady]

Great experiences, thanks for sharing.

[Oldgringo]

A couple, three years ago in Panquich, UT, I was confronted in a filling station by this 'pretty guy' who was driving a Ford King Ranch and who was about 30 years my junior. There were words; however, he decided not to push it with the old guy who had the diesel hose aimed at his face. He had Utah plates on his truck, I'm glad I didn't have to shoot him.

After the music quit, the smoke cleared and the adrenalin rush subsided, I thought, and still think, that was pretty cool.

[TexasGal]

A guy tried to mug me a little over 2 years ago. I worked past the usual lunch time and found myself heading out to grab a bite in the late afternoon. I worked in a high crime area and carried everywhere. Our office and neighboring offices had been broken into several times. Murders had happened very close to our office. I locked up alone at night and regularly saw car loads of gang members driving through our parking lot looking for trouble. That job was why I started carrying a gun. At the time, I was wearing scrubs for work and had my pistol in my purse. I don't do that anymore except rarely maybe a backup gun and this incident is why.

I like a little thai restaurant in a u-shaped strip center nearby so I headed there. Upon arriving, it looked pretty quiet since everyone had gone back to work. I scanned the parking lot as a habit and saw no one at all. I parked nearby and headed in. Reaching the doors, I realized the place was closed for the afternoon. Dang. I paused a moment contemplating where I was going to eat in the short time I had left then spun round 360 degrees to return to my truck. I locked eyes with a young man in his 20's who was approaching me at a fast pace in my blind spot.

He was hunched over somewhat to hide his reflection in the window behind mine as I had stood there. He had his right hand on something in his pocket, and his left just beginning to reach out toward me. He had his hoodie pulled up to cover all but his eyes. The universal crime uniform--especially since it was late August and a humid 105 degrees. The look in his eyes locked on me was something I will not soon forget. Chilling. Unblinking. Determined. The stare of a merciless predator. I instantly knew he meant to do me harm and I had to act. Now. Another few steps and he would be upon me.

In that split second, many things I had read and been taught and practiced and thought about for how to handle something like this zinged into my mind. The adrenaline rush made everything seem to slow down and shrink to those eyes yet his body language also registered with acute clarity. He was tense and ready to handle the confrontation but I had turned round and spoiled his surprise. He was far too close for me to have time to draw and I knew he had his hand on a gun or knife in that pocket so I dodged behind a huge pillar next to me that supported the building. It blocked his immediate view of me for the few seconds it took for me to sprint back out into the parking lot while taking a firing grip on my gun in my purse. I looked back to see he had come round the pillar and followed me a little ways to the edge of the sidewalk and stopped.

I reached my truck and put the engine between us as protection. If I tried to get in the truck, I knew he could still close the distance fast enough to stab or shoot me before I could leave so I decided to make a stand since I had the protection of the engine block and would have time to draw and fire. I put my purse on the truck hood with my hand inside on the gun so he could see the obvious inference and we had a stare down. I know it sounds like bravado, but somehow I knew I had to convince him I was not prey. I showed him the meanest unblinking stare telegraphing to him that he would absolutely find himself full of holes if he came after me. He glanced round the parking lot looking to see who might be noticing our actions then back at me. He glanced at the purse and back to my eyes. I could see he understood it wasn't a cell phone or a can of mace I was holding. I continued to stare with all the fury I could muster at him while shaking my head with a warning. I could see he was not impressed by that, other than to be assessing if I was now too much trouble.

After a few more seconds, he suddenly turned and walked away. As he was about to turn out of sight round the building, he took off the hoodie and draped it round his neck in casual fashion. Underneath, he had on a nice white polo shirt and shorts with new shoes. He went from a terrifying mugger to a nice looking young man you would never notice. He never even looked back at me. Not his first rodeo. It took a couple of hours to stop shaking. I went back to work since people depended on me to be there but it was surreal for a while.

I thought over every step of the entire thing and realized the purse was the worst place to put that gun. Yeah, people say that, but trust me when I say having this guy make your purse his goal he is willing to possibly kill you for is more convincing than words. The purse was carried across my chest not hanging on my arm precisely because it had the gun in it. It has a piano string in the strap. He would have had a hard time getting it off me or cutting it. How would I have accessed the gun while he was flinging me all over the place by the purse strap trying to break it or stabbing me or shooting me to get me to let it go? Why didn't I get out my cell phone to call 911? Because in the seconds I had to act, I had to choose what to focus on that was most likely to save me immediately. I focused on being ready to draw and fire if he left me no choice. Man, I was sure hoping it wouldn't come to that. I realized I must not miss if it did because the business behind him likely had innocent people in it. I would have to let him get close enough to be sure of my aim but not get his hands on me. I know from experience once a man gets his hands on you, it's all usually down hill after that. Women kid themselves most of the time thinking they will just do some karate move and all will be well.

I didn't want to fumble with my off hand trying to get the phone out and take my eyes off him to dial while he was deciding to come after me or not. Why didn't I yell at him? I should have. Not because he would have been swayed by that but because it could have drawn others to look and see there was a problem. The other mistake I made could have been my undoing. Of all the things that flew through my mind, I never considered if he was working alone or with others. He could have flushed me round that pillar right into a buddy's grasp. I could have had someone come up behind me while I was standing next to the truck. I never took my eyes off of him. I should have scanned quickly for others.

Why didn't I draw and point the gun at him? Because I was in full view in a parking lot and frankly didn't want to risk a total misunderstanding of just who was the bad guy if the police did suddenly show up. It was his word against mine and I didn't want to have a hostile or confused witness in that part of town say I pointed a gun for no reason. I learned from this event to keep scanning my surroundings even if I didn't see anything before. I have no idea where the guy was hiding when I got there but I would have seen him sooner if I had kept scanning. You might feel silly looking like a fugitive looking round all the time but it can save you from some unpleasant stuff. I learned I can indeed carry a .38 in scrubs and did every day thereafter while I worked and everywhere else that was legal.

I learned thinking through scenarios, getting training, reading about self defense, etc. isn't wasted time. You may need that knowledge in a split second sooner than you think.

[Cedar Park Dad]

Personal encounters with bums -aka homeless.
1. Standing at the park and ride downtown we are routinely queried by homeless. Other than being annoying this is not too much of an issue. We've had police come up and stop one who was getting overly aggressive (as in smack him with a horse -that was fun).

2. Individually there are bums about but they usually keep their distance. I must not have a pretty face.

[RPBrown]

The one thing that stands out for me was also the deciding factor for my wife to get her CHL. We were at Wallyworld (I never go there unarmed) but had arrived in separate vehicles. I was coming from work but she needed me to load her purchase in the bed of my truck. When I got there she was already inside but told me about 2 "kids" that kept asking her for money as she walked in. She said they kept getting in front of her and almost forcing her.

When we had made the purchase and loaded the item (cant even remember what it was now) in the truck, she started to walk out to her car. I pulled away from the door but went over a couple of isles then up and back down to her car. As she approached the drivers side I pulled up from the passengers side and saw these 2 "kids" squatted down between her passenger door and the car next to hers. She looked up at me as I pulled up and I motioned for her to stop. I stopped the truck and got out and approached these 2. They looked up, saw me and took off running.

When it was all over, my wife asked why I came back around and I told her that I suspected they were just casing her as she was going in. I had seen a news report of similar things happening nearby and I just wanted to make sure she made it safe. Next day she scheduled her class and has been carrying since. Now, though, she has no problems at all to tell someone to get out of her space, very forcefully. She even has no problems telling me too

[VMI77]

A guy tried to mug me a little over 2 years ago. I worked past the usual lunch time and found myself heading out to grab a bite in the late afternoon. I worked in a high crime area and carried everywhere. Our office and neighboring offices had been broken into several times. Murders had happened very close to our office. I locked up alone at night and regularly saw car loads of gang members driving through our parking lot looking for trouble. That job was why I started carrying a gun. At the time, I was wearing scrubs for work and had my pistol in my purse. I don't do that anymore except rarely maybe a backup gun and this incident is why.

I like a little thai restaurant in a u-shaped strip center nearby so I headed there. Upon arriving, it looked pretty quiet since everyone had gone back to work. I scanned the parking lot as a habit and saw no one at all. I parked nearby and headed in. Reaching the doors, I realized the place was closed for the afternoon. Dang. I paused a moment contemplating where I was going to eat in the short time I had left then spun round 360 degrees to return to my truck. I locked eyes with a young man in his 20's who was approaching me at a fast pace in my blind spot.

He was hunched over somewhat to hide his reflection in the window behind mine as I had stood there. He had his right hand on something in his pocket, and his left just beginning to reach out toward me. He had his hoodie pulled up to cover all but his eyes. The universal crime uniform--especially since it was late August and a humid 105 degrees. The look in his eyes locked on me was something I will not soon forget. Chilling. Unblinking. Determined. The stare of a merciless predator. I instantly knew he meant to do me harm and I had to act. Now. Another few steps and he would be upon me.

In that split second, many things I had read and been taught and practiced and thought about for how to handle something like this zinged into my mind. The adrenaline rush made everything seem to slow down and shrink to those eyes yet his body language also registered with acute clarity. He was tense and ready to handle the confrontation but I had turned round and spoiled his surprise. He was far too close for me to have time to draw and I knew he had his hand on a gun or knife in that pocket so I dodged behind a huge pillar next to me that supported the building. It blocked his immediate view of me for the few seconds it took for me to sprint back out into the parking lot while taking a firing grip on my gun in my purse. I looked back to see he had come round the pillar and followed me a little ways to the edge of the sidewalk and stopped.

I reached my truck and put the engine between us as protection. If I tried to get in the truck, I knew he could still close the distance fast enough to stab or shoot me before I could leave so I decided to make a stand since I had the protection of the engine block and would have time to draw and fire. I put my purse on the truck hood with my hand inside on the gun so he could see the obvious inference and we had a stare down. I know it sounds like bravado, but somehow I knew I had to convince him I was not prey. I showed him the meanest unblinking stare telegraphing to him that he would absolutely find himself full of holes if he came after me. He glanced round the parking lot looking to see who might be noticing our actions then back at me. He glanced at the purse and back to my eyes. I could see he understood it wasn't a cell phone or a can of mace I was holding. I continued to stare with all the fury I could muster at him while shaking my head with a warning. I could see he was not impressed by that, other than to be assessing if I was now too much trouble.

After a few more seconds, he suddenly turned and walked away. As he was about to turn out of sight round the building, he took off the hoodie and draped it round his neck in casual fashion. Underneath, he had on a nice white polo shirt and shorts with new shoes. He went from a terrifying mugger to a nice looking young man you would never notice. He never even looked back at me. Not his first rodeo. It took a couple of hours to stop shaking. I went back to work since people depended on me to be there but it was surreal for a while.

I thought over every step of the entire thing and realized the purse was the worst place to put that gun. Yeah, people say that, but trust me when I say having this guy make your purse his goal he is willing to possibly kill you for is more convincing than words. The purse was carried across my chest not hanging on my arm precisely because it had the gun in it. It has a piano string in the strap. He would have had a hard time getting it off me or cutting it. How would I have accessed the gun while he was flinging me all over the place by the purse strap trying to break it or stabbing me or shooting me to get me to let it go? Why didn't I get out my cell phone to call 911? Because in the seconds I had to act, I had to choose what to focus on that was most likely to save me immediately. I focused on being ready to draw and fire if he left me no choice. Man, I was sure hoping it wouldn't come to that. I realized I must not miss if it did because the business behind him likely had innocent people in it. I would have to let him get close enough to be sure of my aim but not get his hands on me. I know from experience once a man gets his hands on you, it's all usually down hill after that. Women kid themselves most of the time thinking they will just do some karate move and all will be well.

I didn't want to fumble with my off hand trying to get the phone out and take my eyes off him to dial while he was deciding to come after me or not. Why didn't I yell at him? I should have. Not because he would have been swayed by that but because it could have drawn others to look and see there was a problem. The other mistake I made could have been my undoing. Of all the things that flew through my mind, I never considered if he was working alone or with others. He could have flushed me round that pillar right into a buddy's grasp. I could have had someone come up behind me while I was standing next to the truck. I never took my eyes off of him. I should have scanned quickly for others.

Why didn't I draw and point the gun at him? Because I was in full view in a parking lot and frankly didn't want to risk a total misunderstanding of just who was the bad guy if the police did suddenly show up. It was his word against mine and I didn't want to have a hostile or confused witness in that part of town say I pointed a gun for no reason. I learned from this event to keep scanning my surroundings even if I didn't see anything before. I have no idea where the guy was hiding when I got there but I would have seen him sooner if I had kept scanning. You might feel silly looking like a fugitive looking round all the time but it can save you from some unpleasant stuff. I learned I can indeed carry a .38 in scrubs and did every day thereafter while I worked and everywhere else that was legal.

I learned thinking through scenarios, getting training, reading about self defense, etc. isn't wasted time. You may need that knowledge in a split second sooner than you think.

Sounds like you handled it just about perfectly under the circumstances. I wish I could convince my wife to carry and to prepare herself as you have.

[Rikk101]

CHL Lady, thank you for taking the time to compose and share that story. Your post has the feel of an excerpt from a well written crime novel, but has the added impact of being for real. Good reading for anyone considering whether or not to obtain their CHL, or for that matter, everyone who already has their CHL as well!

[suthdj]

A guy tried to mug me a little over 2 years ago. I worked past the usual lunch time and found myself heading out to grab a bite in the late afternoon. I worked in a high crime area and carried everywhere. Our office and neighboring offices had been broken into several times. Murders had happened very close to our office. I locked up alone at night and regularly saw car loads of gang members driving through our parking lot looking for trouble. That job was why I started carrying a gun. At the time, I was wearing scrubs for work and had my pistol in my purse. I don't do that anymore except rarely maybe a backup gun and this incident is why.

I like a little thai restaurant in a u-shaped strip center nearby so I headed there. Upon arriving, it looked pretty quiet since everyone had gone back to work. I scanned the parking lot as a habit and saw no one at all. I parked nearby and headed in. Reaching the doors, I realized the place was closed for the afternoon. Dang. I paused a moment contemplating where I was going to eat in the short time I had left then spun round 360 degrees to return to my truck. I locked eyes with a young man in his 20's who was approaching me at a fast pace in my blind spot.

He was hunched over somewhat to hide his reflection in the window behind mine as I had stood there. He had his right hand on something in his pocket, and his left just beginning to reach out toward me. He had his hoodie pulled up to cover all but his eyes. The universal crime uniform--especially since it was late August and a humid 105 degrees. The look in his eyes locked on me was something I will not soon forget. Chilling. Unblinking. Determined. The stare of a merciless predator. I instantly knew he meant to do me harm and I had to act. Now. Another few steps and he would be upon me.

In that split second, many things I had read and been taught and practiced and thought about for how to handle something like this zinged into my mind. The adrenaline rush made everything seem to slow down and shrink to those eyes yet his body language also registered with acute clarity. He was tense and ready to handle the confrontation but I had turned round and spoiled his surprise. He was far too close for me to have time to draw and I knew he had his hand on a gun or knife in that pocket so I dodged behind a huge pillar next to me that supported the building. It blocked his immediate view of me for the few seconds it took for me to sprint back out into the parking lot while taking a firing grip on my gun in my purse. I looked back to see he had come round the pillar and followed me a little ways to the edge of the sidewalk and stopped.

I reached my truck and put the engine between us as protection. If I tried to get in the truck, I knew he could still close the distance fast enough to stab or shoot me before I could leave so I decided to make a stand since I had the protection of the engine block and would have time to draw and fire. I put my purse on the truck hood with my hand inside on the gun so he could see the obvious inference and we had a stare down. I know it sounds like bravado, but somehow I knew I had to convince him I was not prey. I showed him the meanest unblinking stare telegraphing to him that he would absolutely find himself full of holes if he came after me. He glanced round the parking lot looking to see who might be noticing our actions then back at me. He glanced at the purse and back to my eyes. I could see he understood it wasn't a cell phone or a can of mace I was holding. I continued to stare with all the fury I could muster at him while shaking my head with a warning. I could see he was not impressed by that, other than to be assessing if I was now too much trouble.

After a few more seconds, he suddenly turned and walked away. As he was about to turn out of sight round the building, he took off the hoodie and draped it round his neck in casual fashion. Underneath, he had on a nice white polo shirt and shorts with new shoes. He went from a terrifying mugger to a nice looking young man you would never notice. He never even looked back at me. Not his first rodeo. It took a couple of hours to stop shaking. I went back to work since people depended on me to be there but it was surreal for a while.

I thought over every step of the entire thing and realized the purse was the worst place to put that gun. Yeah, people say that, but trust me when I say having this guy make your purse his goal he is willing to possibly kill you for is more convincing than words. The purse was carried across my chest not hanging on my arm precisely because it had the gun in it. It has a piano string in the strap. He would have had a hard time getting it off me or cutting it. How would I have accessed the gun while he was flinging me all over the place by the purse strap trying to break it or stabbing me or shooting me to get me to let it go? Why didn't I get out my cell phone to call 911? Because in the seconds I had to act, I had to choose what to focus on that was most likely to save me immediately. I focused on being ready to draw and fire if he left me no choice. Man, I was sure hoping it wouldn't come to that. I realized I must not miss if it did because the business behind him likely had innocent people in it. I would have to let him get close enough to be sure of my aim but not get his hands on me. I know from experience once a man gets his hands on you, it's all usually down hill after that. Women kid themselves most of the time thinking they will just do some karate move and all will be well.

I didn't want to fumble with my off hand trying to get the phone out and take my eyes off him to dial while he was deciding to come after me or not. Why didn't I yell at him? I should have. Not because he would have been swayed by that but because it could have drawn others to look and see there was a problem. The other mistake I made could have been my undoing. Of all the things that flew through my mind, I never considered if he was working alone or with others. He could have flushed me round that pillar right into a buddy's grasp. I could have had someone come up behind me while I was standing next to the truck. I never took my eyes off of him. I should have scanned quickly for others.

Why didn't I draw and point the gun at him? Because I was in full view in a parking lot and frankly didn't want to risk a total misunderstanding of just who was the bad guy if the police did suddenly show up. It was his word against mine and I didn't want to have a hostile or confused witness in that part of town say I pointed a gun for no reason. I learned from this event to keep scanning my surroundings even if I didn't see anything before. I have no idea where the guy was hiding when I got there but I would have seen him sooner if I had kept scanning. You might feel silly looking like a fugitive looking round all the time but it can save you from some unpleasant stuff. I learned I can indeed carry a .38 in scrubs and did every day thereafter while I worked and everywhere else that was legal.

I learned thinking through scenarios, getting training, reading about self defense, etc. isn't wasted time. You may need that knowledge in a split second sooner than you think.

Sounds like you handled it just about perfectly under the circumstances. I wish I could convince my wife to carry and to prepare herself as you have.

I would say great job, but you missed 1 important item........ what did you finally have for lunch?

[TexasGal]

I ended up with a Whatachicken instead of my nice stir fry but I wasn't going to complain. I was feeling pretty lucky.