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Repeated death threats and he knows where you live? I would report it to the police and there's no reason for her and this maniac to talk to each other. She's not in a position to "fix" him. If she doesn't support you, like others have said, then there's your answer on her loyality. If he punches holes in walls with her around what is he capable of doing when he shows up at YOUR family's home? I would also find out what kind of car he drives and be careful the next time you or your family do the Wally walk.

There's no reason to ever talk to this guy. I handle conflict situations all day long and these types of guys aren't going to "vent" and be over it. He'll vent until he gets what he wants e.g. causes enough strife in your relationship to where y'all will break up. If he has any clue that she's downplaying this situation then that will enable him to pick it up a notch.

Take care and my prayers are with you and your family, and this guy as well...

Yeah you guys are right. The more I think about it, the more I realize how not worth it this relationship is.

Hos - I never planned on sitting down and having a heart to heart with the guy.

Oldgringo - I technically have an older step brother, three older step sisters, an older sister, three younger brothers, and a younger half-brother. Although I doubt I would have said anything about being raised by 4 sisters because they step sisters never lived with me.
I forgave the guy and moved on. Leaving vengeance to the Lord, partially out of the kindness of my heart, partially because I couldn't track him down after the fact. Did I mention that I got a new phone for free?

Wildbill - I'm guessing you're saying that I should just kick her to the curb no mercy style and move on? While I don't think that's a bad plan, I've never been one to brutal with other's emotions when a soft but firm approach will get the job done... and I still need info on the guy out of her. Also, I didn't expect her to be entirely over him in this short of a time frame. I know that stuff can take some time. Though I do agree that if she'd rather protect him than me, then I need to get out.

Thanks everyone for the advice and prayers.

Fangs wrote:and I still need info on the guy out of her.

Haven't you ever heard of waterboarding?

pedalman wrote:

mymojo wrote:Contact his C.O. - they tend to frown on that type of behavoir.

Actually, the office of the Provost Marshal at the post where the Marine is stationed would be your best bet.

The young man's First Sergeant would also be a better contact than the CO, but this would depend on knowing his specific unit.

My bet is that the PMO will gaff you off. The 1st Sgt almost always will at least listen and most likely put a bug in the kids ear. He may not make you happy when you tell him, but at least he will be aware.

Fangs:

Filing a report with the USMC through the chain of command would seem to be
covering your bases, as well as the civilian police department.

But let's back up here: You don't know his last name? Ask your "girl friend"!
Here we have a situation where she allegedly cares about you and she won't
give you the boyfriend's full name so that you can keep from being murdered?

If she won't give up all the details about this potential murderer of you and your
family members, you need to kick this gal to the curb. Believe me and the rest of
the guys here: With this drama early on in your relationship, fasten your seat belt
for the rest of your life if you stay with her.

Even if she doesn't give you the crazy ex's last name, you may know his home town,
and the USMC office where he joined up. Just like a police detective, start building
the bread crumb trail to him through things that you DO know.

"No woman, no cry."
Bob Marley

Truer words were never spoken.

Good luck getting free of this troublesome situation.

Fangs wrote:I asked the gf how she thinks he'd attempt to kill me if it came down to it, she said bare hands or knife. Excellent. Last thing I need is someone firing at me with the house and my family behind me.
Oh, I've sparred with Marines before, and know I can handle myself in a physical confrontation. I'd just prefer to never let it get there.

Fangs - This will be my last post in this thread. Your "discussions" with your girlfriend seem to be as serious as deciding what movie y'all should see.

Sparring is not the same as a life and death fight. Have you ever seen what a jealous 50 year old ex-football player with no Marine training can do to a physically fit 25 year old man and his girlfriend with a Swiss Army knife?

All the best to you.

Whatever you end up doing with your relationship with this girl, you need to find out the name of the Marine and report the death threat to the police and the Marine Corps, preferably his First Sargent or CO. His First Sargent or CO will "counsel" him which may prevent him from carrying out the threat. The police report will put you in the role of good guy if the "counseling" doesn't work, he comes after you and you kill him. It is of utmost legal importance for the police to see you as the good guy if something does happen.

Second, sparring with a Marine is not the same as being in a life and death struggle with one. A year or so ago there was a story of a Marine who was stalked by four gang members who had a shotgun and a pistol. The Marine had a Swiss Army knife. He killed at least one or two of them, injured the others and ended up with the shotgun and pistol. You don't say whether this Marine has been in combat or not but regardless, they are trained to kill by the best. While you seem like a guy who has been in enough scrapes to be able to handle himself, remember this guy has been trained to be a killer.

Third, my son-in-law is a Marine and from the discussions I have had with him, I think he would agree with the following. While I completely respect the Marines for their sacrifices on behalf of our country, some of the young enlisted men do not yet have the highest moral character, they get into trouble over women, they don't use their brains and they can be very dangerous. This guy appears to fit perfectly in this category of young Marine.

So don't underestimate this guy!

As far as your girl friend, she obviously told the Marine your name or gave him enough information to figure it out. If she won't reciprocate by giving you his name, she does not deserve you or your protection.

You gotta wonder why she gave him enough information to track down your address, but hasn't told you his last name. I suggest you run. Not from him, but from her.

WildBill wrote:

Fangs wrote:I asked the gf how she thinks he'd attempt to kill me if it came down to it, she said bare hands or knife. Excellent. Last thing I need is someone firing at me with the house and my family behind me.
Oh, I've sparred with Marines before, and know I can handle myself in a physical confrontation. I'd just prefer to never let it get there.

Fangs - This will be my last post in this thread. Your "discussions" with your girlfriend seem to be as serious as deciding what movie y'all should see.

Sparring is not the same as a life and death fight. Have you ever seen what a jealous 50 year old ex-football player with no Marine training can do to a physically fit 25 year old man and his girlfriend with a Swiss Army knife?

All the best to you.

I agree with WildBill . Once you learn your enemy's name, you should put some of your Ninja Kung Fu stuff on his sorry hienie and he'll probably leave you alone and your gf will probably love you a lot more and forget her previous relationship with one of our nation's chosen few- a marine.

Fangs wrote:Wildbill - I'm guessing you're saying that I should just kick her to the curb no mercy style and move on? While I don't think that's a bad plan, I've never been one to brutal with other's emotions when a soft but firm approach will get the job done... and I still need info on the guy out of her. Also, I didn't expect her to be entirely over him in this short of a time frame. I know that stuff can take some time. Though I do agree that if she'd rather protect him than me, then I need to get out.

Unfortunately, your "exit" may be a long and difficult one. People with these types of issues tend to never get over stuff and keep popping up in your life for a long time. My ex-wife has a thing for "tough guys". Even though our kids together are all over 18 and we have been divorced more than 16 years, it is still a constant struggle to keep the chaos of her life out of mine.

Run away as fast as you can and don't look back.

Too much drama soon in the relationship and she respects his privacy more than yours. Time to let her become a problem to someone else.

Drama is a lot more fun when it is on TV instead of in your life.

You posted a pic of her with your dog on your or your gf's facebook account? How does 'he' have viewable access to this? There are personal, privacy settings to keep google searches (of your name/fb account) or 'friends of friends' from viewing your data.

Possibility #1: that she has a facebook account and she has granted access to 'him' by making him a friend... in which case, can he simply view her friends list and check up on her.... is she actually 'over him'?

When you visit her page next time, you could possibly find out his last name if he has an account..... as you can see her 'friends list'

Possibility #2: Your gf has other fb friends whom 'the ex' is friends with (or you are for that matter) at which point he can see what they see via the 'friends of friends' view (default setting).

Dig some more. It seems strange that he can gather so much intelligence without much effort....and I think the level of protection or rationale your gf gives this guy is a huge flag to abandon the mission altogether. JMHO Good luck

Rok

If she gave him information about you but won't even give you his full name then she showed where her loyalty is. If her friends are feeding him information then they probably want them back together. Either way it sounds like too much drama if you don't have a child with this girl.