Re: So I'm in the waiting room at Parkland hospital
Posted: Mon May 05, 2014 12:03 am
It sure is.
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Rather 83 or 23, I'd suspect THAT mistake won't be made again. I'd definitely leave it up to him.surferdaddy wrote:My father in law will have to make his own decisions regarding this matter. My wife, however, has likely already decided to disallow his carrying in our home.
I understand what you are saying, while others want to argue with what they think you are saying (these folks tend to argue in many other posts and with walls), I see your tough situation. Maybe, since you are an instructor, you could get him to attend a class on your dime, just to refresh safety. He may take you up on that due to what I am sure is an embarrassing situation for him.surferdaddy wrote:He's a grown man who makes his own decisions. Do I wish he practiced more thorough gun safety, yes I do. I also feel that most individuals I have observed could be a bit more aware if their muzzles and trigger fingers, myself included. I can not and should not tell him he doesn't have the right to utilize a firearm to protect himself. I am only saying that there is not a snowballs chance my wife will allow him to carry in our home after he just shot himself through the hand, an I'm not too sure I disagree with her. Family out and about with Papa, he decides and his firearm will be safely holstered according to the law, this is not our rule it is simply the law. A holstered gun is a safe gun.
Did I mention this is a sensitive subject?
Man it sucks, wish I could have prevented it somehow. I am an NRA pistol and home firearm safety instructor for goodness sakes. I've tried to address his lack of gun safety knowledge whenever I've witnessed it, but I probably could have done more and been more adamant. It is sometimes hard dealing with in laws. I will be more stern in the presence of lack gun safety from now on for sure.
Surfer
I have actually spoken to him about the incident; he simply (and somewhat casually) attributes the entire affair to a "senior moment." This attitude did NOT make me feel any better, even if it is true. In all honesty, I don't really know what MY expectations are. I feel torn between my obvious duty to keep my family safe and my desire to see my FIL maintain what he feels to be a reasonable level of personal security. I have mentioned that maybe a revolver would be a good idea; because they are not "sneaky," to which he replied "well heck, all guns are treated as if they are always loaded, how should a wheel gun be any different from my glock?" Touché. Of course he is right! However, here again lies an issue; no matter what I do to try to instill safe gun handling in him, he ultimately ignores it after initially seeming receptive.mtnthundr2 wrote:Have you asked your FIL what HE thinks of the incident? Maybe just an open-ended question, something that will give him some room to start an honest conversation with you. He may just surprise you with his insight/answer and may come up with some pretty good solutions for going forward. If nothing else, it will plant a seed of thought for him to self analyze the situation and he may come back to you at a later date and want to continue the conversation. Its a difficult spot to be in for sure, we want to allow them their independence but be able to secure their safety as well as everyone else s :( Good luck to you, I hope things are settling down some for you and your family.
surferdaddy wrote:I have actually spoken to him about the incident; he simply (and somewhat casually) attributes the entire affair to a "senior moment." This attitude did NOT make me feel any better, even if it is true. In all honesty, I don't really know what MY expectations are. I feel torn between my obvious duty to keep my family safe and my desire to see my FIL maintain what he feels to be a reasonable level of personal security. I have mentioned that maybe a revolver would be a good idea; because they are not "sneaky," to which he replied "well heck, all guns are treated as if they are always loaded, how should a wheel gun be any different from my glock?" Touché. Of course he is right! However, here again lies an issue; no matter what I do to try to instill safe gun handling in him, he ultimately ignores it after initially seeming receptive.mtnthundr2 wrote:Have you asked your FIL what HE thinks of the incident? Maybe just an open-ended question, something that will give him some room to start an honest conversation with you. He may just surprise you with his insight/answer and may come up with some pretty good solutions for going forward. If nothing else, it will plant a seed of thought for him to self analyze the situation and he may come back to you at a later date and want to continue the conversation. Its a difficult spot to be in for sure, we want to allow them their independence but be able to secure their safety as well as everyone else s :( Good luck to you, I hope things are settling down some for you and your family.In the end I have been forced to side with my better half and restrict what he does in our home. I only hope he stays safe "out there." Don't really know what else to do but hope.
On a side note, he has had all his stitches removed and aside from some diminished mobility and loss of sensitivity, he has healed relatively well.
C-dub, he is actually doing quite well. He healed up far better than I would have believed possible. All seems pretty much back to normal; with the exception that I'm aware that this situation will likely rear its head again in the not too distant future.C-dub wrote:Surferdaddy's FIL is not the first senior to have a senior moment and there are plenty of youngsters that have had these type of lethal and potentially lethal "senior" moments. The apparent lack of Surferdaddy's unwillingness to go down this road of disarming his FIL can be a tough turn to take for anyone. If his FIL is an intelligent man and does still have some or most of his faculties, he may see the inevitable coming and realize it would be better for everyone's safety to gift most or all of his firearms too family. Some of us have already gone through this with our parents. Some of us are on the verge of that discussion with our parents and some of use may be the parents on the verge of that realization for ourselves and our safety.
BTW, this is nearly four months ago now. How is your FIL doing?
WaitingGame, the MIL is still with us but not with him. She recently got into shooting a bit and she is an excellent student and a good shot to boot.WaitingGame wrote:I don't think I have any good advice but with you the best of luck and glad that his injuries weren't as severe as they potentially could've been.
Is mother in law still with us or has she passed? Maybe have her help during cleaning time with a gun check?