Natalie Portman will slay Zombies in Jane Austen Film

[WarHawk-AVG]

Rule #1 for zombies?!?!?


Anyone?




Shoot em in the head!

[The Annoyed Man]

Rule #1 for zombies?!?!?


Anyone?




Shoot em in the head!

Nope. Wrong. The 32 rules, in order are:

Rule 1: Cardio: This one comes up in Zombieland and clearly makes alot of sense. How many fat people do you see at the end of the world when its zombies doing the ending?


Rule 2: Beware of Bathrooms: Really not just bathrooms any good apocalyptic zombie survivor should know better then going into a bathroom, small closet or any other small room with only one way in or out. Only thing stupider to go into then a bathroom is a movie theater. Lots of places to run around before you get eaten.


Rule 3: Seatbelts: Its a safe bet unless your a complete dumb dumb ( see rule #7 ) your not going to be hoofing it on foot in the event of a zombie outbreak. So when travelling on four wheels wear your seat belt. Nothing worse then finding yourself ejected out of your car into the loving and oh so hungry arms of zombies.


Rule 4: Doubletap: Carrying a gun is a great idea but it should never be your primary weapon. When you do end up using it for that last minute 'oh no' moment remember to double tap. Its an emergency and thats why your using it and not your cricket bat so why skimp? One bullet more in the head will go a long way to ensuring your survival.


Rule 5: No Attachments: This is a tough one but you can not have attachments. If you got kids or a wife your less likely to survive then the gal or guy who has no attachments and nothing slowing him or her down. Or worse yet making bonehead decisions like 'going back into the room'


Rule 6: Travel in a Group: The best way to increase your odds of survival when travelling in a zombie outbreak is to make sure your a traveling buffet. Going it alone gives the zombies no choices but to eat you. Going it with the old man with the limp, the little kid who cant run and the middle aged woman with the plastic leg gives the zombies more options and you better odds you can run away faster then they can.

CLICK HERE FOR THE REST OF THE RULES

Sorry dude.... although shooting them in the head is good. There's no denying it.

[Mikel]

My dreams have come true.

Thank you for your support, Mikel. Which script treatment do you like best?

Oh. You mean the Natalie Portman thing...

I could care less about the script, I just wanna see a (hopefully) scantly clad Natalie Portman killing Zombies. I hope she looks as good as I think she will while shooting big guns.